Lewis Carroll:If you limit your actions in life to things that nobody can possibly find fault with, you will not do much.
Steven Stosny (2013) opines, “Except for saints and literary characters, enduring change rarely happens as the result of being knocked off our feet by a spiritual or psychological whack upside the head. Perdurable change is gradual and mundane. It occurs by extending, supplementing, and altering the habits that shape perspectives and drive behavior. First comes the hard work; then comes the epiphany.” (Stosny, S. Blue-collar therapy. Psychotherapy Networker, 2013,37, 6, p. 23)
J. Chamberlin (2013) reports that recent research findings suggest that tiger-parenting does not build child prodigies. Instead, supportive parenting leads to the most positive development and highest grade point averages. (Monitor on Psychology, 20123, 44, 8, pp. 16-17.)
Bern Williams: Sooner or later we all quote our mothers.
In a recent issue of Scientific American Mind (2013, 44, 1), it was observed that compassionate goals toward others seem to protect against feelings of failure, even when the desired outcomes do not come about. Also, “self-compassion helps you accept life’s inevitable setbacks as simply part of what it means to be human” (pp. 32-33).
Studies show that most adults spend one-quarter of their waking hours in silent self-talk and sometimes say what they are thinking out loud. Inner talk serves a variety of adaptive functions. It helps with solving problems, taming emotions, motivating us through our personal pep talks, self-correcting, and planning for the future. It can backfire, if it becomes too negative and pessimistic because it can fuel depression and anxiety Nevertheless, some think it is responsible for our self-awareness. In other words, only through talking to yourself can you know yourself. (Jabr, F. Speak for yourself. Scientific American Mind, 2014, 25, 1, pp. 45-51.)
Jonathan Katz: I was having dinner with my mother last night, and I made a classic Freudian slip. I meant to say, “Would you please pass the the salt?” but it came out, “You ruined my life.”
Happy New Year!
George R. R. Martin: A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies. The man who never reads lives only one.
Upon the recommendation of a dear friend, I have just read The Signature of All Things (2013) by Elizabeth Gilbert. It has been an excellent read. Especially impressive have been Ms. Gilbert’s mastery of the science of botany, which frames the story, and her rendition of the time in which the story is set, the 1800’s. But even better is her portrayal of the life-long struggles of one woman, Alma Whittaker, with what seemed to her to be the contradictory elements inherent in a rational scientific approach to work and life, sexual passion, and mystical spirituality. Over the course of her life, Alma became an expert in botany and even an independent discoverer of evolution, a virgin wife, and a respectful doubter of the mystical. Although never able to reconcile completely reason with passion and with the mystical, she did what she could and as she matured, became far more tolerant of the contradictions she still perceived and those who were struggling with them as well.